Damilola Oyedeji after J. Estanislao Lopez March 2024
One morning I found that the birds had flown away from my window. I am in a peremptory
matrimony with Silence, who plants his index on my lips & forces himself on me. My bodies flung themselves out of reach, now their bones are the bed of the Atlantic; you flung your body from my arms and now the rusty gate that preceded your waiting body hides behind the curtains of my eyes. To fill this echoing chamber of ache, after I poured dust to dust, I try to grapple with the senselessness of being or why exiting strangles those who are left behind. I call Death with my pen and ask why he has such good taste in men. It culls the squall in my belly, settles the rage between my thighs & unravels memories hidden in clutter. I saw your father saddle his soul against the wind of a world where your name lazes in history. How does one drain oceans of these ashes? How does one find a home? Home is where a timeworn fan autotunes the dirge of my bodies & you, sung by birds outside the window.
My bodies lived before me, still, I continue to pour dust upon their dust
& upon you too, I bury your body with letters, marry Strength
and relish the emancipating act of dying & loving.
Damilola Oyedeji (Ariella) is a Nigerian poet, essayist and educator currently based in the US. Damilola’s story, Nature’s Trick, was included in the ANTOA Writing Contest 2021 shortlist. Her poems have been published in Synchronized Chaos Magazine, Spillwords and elsewhere. She is currently a creative writing candidate at Missouri State University.
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